Open Question: Is my creative writing any good?

Random Post

• VTC – Perl Fundamentals-QUANTUM
• VTC - Perl Fundamentals-QUANTUM English | .BIN | 670MB Genre: eLearning Author Joshua Mostafa takes
• Probability Space: Probability Trilogy, Book 3 – Nancy Kress
• Probability Space: Probability Trilogy, Book 3 - Nancy Kress Publisher: Audible Frontiers | Decembe
• Studying at a distance
• Studying at a distance Open University Press | July 1, 2003 | ISBN-10: 0335213367 | 174 pages | PDF
• Vertex Pusher Bonus video for Cinema 4d R13
• Photo: Vertex Pusher Bonus video for Cinema 4d R13 English | h264, yuv420p, 1440x900, 524 kb/s, 15.

This is the beginning of my creative writing piece that I have written for my GCSE coursework. Please tell me honestly if you think it’s any good, I could do with the feedback. It’s not finished yet. It’s a bit long so you dn’t have to read it all just tell em your first impressions. The mainsail ceased it’s flapping as the wind filled it, and gradually the boat gained speed, gliding ever more effortlessly through the water. The gentle ripples lapped against the side of the boat as it sailed, a sound that that I found so entrancingly beautiful that it sent shivers down my spine. Nothing compared to this, nothing else in my life was as incredible as the feeling that this gave me. It was just me, the boat and the sea, and of course my Dad. He stood there of the fore deck, gazing at me with a subtle smile. He knew my feelings, he too shared my passion. The water was my liberation; it was a haven from everything, a quilt of blue that protected me from all of life’s problems. Even as we left the more sheltered waters of the river for the more open sea of the estuary and the waves grew larger it was as stunning as ever. My eyes occasionally took a glance at the white horses galloping over the blue carpet; all the while watching the compass, my protector and guide, keeping me safe in the blue desert, and directing me. I love to watch it move with the motion of the boat; it keeps with the rhythm of the waves. As everything seems to do, just moving however fast or slow the sea should choose. The sun sparkled on the water, and was warm against my skin. The breeze was just about perfect. It seemed to me such a rarity that the weather was as faultless as today. Although I often dream of conditions like this, mostly at school, while staring out the windows as teachers try to cram my head with information which possibly I will never need to know, while no learning is lost their wisdom is perhaps wasted on me. As magnificent as it was the wind did have a slight chill to it, so I tugged down the rolled up sleeves of my jumper to ease the slightly uncomfortable feeling it gave me. It was to be a long trip, and I had been eagerly looking forward to it for some weeks. At this point my Dad decides to take the helm, so freed from the responsibility, I went up to the bow of the boat and spread myself out on the fore deck, thinking of how wonderful my life could be. At his point there is a mild temptation within me to throw my arms out in a Titanic like gesture, but deciding this is not of ideas, I resist my wild imagination. This was living, and I was not going to ruin it by making a fool of myself, even if there was no one around to witness it. I felt undoubtedly that if this was the only day like it for the whole of my life, I would know life was not wasted. This one moment was worth anything life could throw at me. As the waves became larger, harshly tossing the boat around, the clouds ominously huddled together, their dark curves mocking me, and with a crack they burst open and the rain, slow at first, fell, plummeted downwards. As the rain intensified, the large droplets striking the sails and rigging collected and poured mercilessly into the cockpit. It kept falling faster and faster, until it became almost an impenetrable curtain of water. Its iciness stung my cheeks, and made my fingers stiff and cold. I looked up at the sky, it was as if someone had pulled a thick black curtain over the sky, and the glorious sunshine that made the water sparkle and the horizon glisten was gone. The sea, that had once appeared blue was now grey in colour, the white horses that galloped had become angry and threatening. The spray from the seemingly livid sea, joined with the rain, making it even more unbearable. The salt stung my eyes, and I was now unable to see more that a few feet.

Read the original here: 

http://answers.yahoo.com/question/index?qid=20090420144513AAn1hDm